When Your Muse Deserts You

​We’ve all been there. “Nothing inspires me.” “I can’t do this.” I’m going to break my brushes in half.” I watch TV, wander around the house finding small jobs that need attention, find some excuse to go to the hardware or grocery store.

Anywhere but the studio.
​
Carol tries to nudge me. “You haven’t painted in several days. Don’t you have something you should be working on?”

I try to duck. “I painted the dining room.”

What I’m really experiencing is a crisis of confidence and I know that there is only one way to break out of it. Do something I like. Paint something I can be proud of.
Sounds simple. It’s not.
Prayer helps. “Open my heart. Focus my eye. Guide my hand.”
Finally, I settle at the painting table and start a fresh project, possibly a gift I intend to present to a relative for Christmas.
Aha! Time pressure. I must complete this.
Soon, I am lost in the magic of the medium and actually produce something I like. This time, it was the little alpaca sketch. Last time, it was the dog.
How do we lose confidence? Why do we do this? Why does the muse abandon us? (The bitch).
Some advise simply playing. Pool some paint on paper and push it around until inspiration strikes. This doesn’t work for me.
“It’s only a piece of paper.” “Yes, but it’s my piece of paper!”
Watercolor isn’t life or death. It’s more important than that!
Back to the painting table. Maybe the Muse will slip in while I’m working.

​Sometimes, she does.

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